A tale of curious feet and an itchy soul

Music, bioengineering and discussing mail order cloned supermodel brides with your English class…

So I had my first lessons yesterday.

Rather, lessons that I was teaching.

I had the best intentions and all the world’s confidence.

Yet my multimedia failed to live up to my expectations.

And I had no idea what I was doing.

I was like the fool walking into the cockpit of an Aeroplane, as the unconscious pilots threatens to put the thing into a tailspin, taking hold of the controls and promptly driving the craft and everyone on board several meters into the ground….

So, suffice to say, it went swimmingly.

For the first lesson I was teaching intermediate students. That was… interesting. I wanted to teach them how to talk about music. The method prompting the madness being that if you want to talk to someone in English and make friends, Music is generally a good subject to talk about, as everyone all over the world listens to some kind of music or another. Otherwise they are possibly stunted in some way, at which point you may open their world to endless possibilities of audio goodness.

It started out how I expected it would. I talked too quickly and was quite a bit nervous. Instead of letting the students talk for a bit with me to introduce themselves and practise their english, I kind of forced the conversation into talking about Music. Unfortunately, my materials were something that I drew up myself and were pretty damn shocking. I stumbled through the scripted conversation about music between two strangers. And tried to turn the topic towards the universality of music, and played a video of Bobby Mcferrin crossing language barriers with the Pentatonic scale. And, of course, there was not enough sound and one out of three of my students understood what the video and/or the lesson was about.

My second class was even more… interesting… I had arranged to talk with the higher level students (the highest level achievable within the consulting company) about bioengineering and it’s implications for society and the world as we know it. I figured it’s a good talking point, as most people have an opinion.

However, the multimedia device this time failed to work altogether, apparently the computer had crashed earlier and it needed to be reset. Something that is well beyond my knowledge at this point in time (a’cursed multimedia teaching devices!). So instead, the lesson proceeded as a “make believe” session whereby I told my students about the state of the technology at present and what they thought would become of it in the foreseeable future.

Our brainstorming sessions resulted in these ideas:

– A means to prolong human life through cloning

– A winged, amphibious super soldier to fight all of man’s wars for him complete with the specific virus to wipe them from the face of the earth should some kind of revolt occur

– A company that performs resurrections through cloning techniques.

– Mail order cloned supermodel brides.

Upon the suggestion of the last one, I was a little taken aback, but a part of me shouldn’t have been surprised. After all, look at what porn did to the Internet! It only made sense.

I learned today though that the boy who suggested this was much younger that I thought he was. Not a bad way to start your English consulting career hey?


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